Thursday, September 24, 2009

The emotionless pregnancy update

30 weeks down, working on 31 weeks.  Went to my midwife appointment today, where I learned that I was not immune to Chicken Pox any longer--so if you have it, or have been exposed to it, or Shingles-please stay away.  I need to be vaccinated again, but not until after I have the baby.  Sorry Mom, no contact till after this kid is born.

I am also slighly anemic.  Iron levels should be greater than 10, and mine are around 11.  She recommended taking a liquid Iron supplement that is easy on the tummy and doesn't cause additional constipation.  I will try eating more Iron Rich foods first since the supplement is $30 for a small bottle.  I do wonder if the slight anemia isn't the reason why I have fallen asleep reading my son books a couple of times.  I chalked it up to general pregnancy fatigue.

The kiddo is still in the breech position. We still have several weeks before any action needs to be taken or decisions made. But, I suspect that he will be staying in this spot.  Which, BTW, is painful.  Every time this kid moves it feels like my innards are going to be punctured.  I feel like he could just poke his foot out of my vagina (or worse, use your imagination)--it is that close and odd feeling.  And this kid moves ALL THE TIME.

I actually am having some real anxiety about the energy levels of this kid.  I keep hearing that children's behavior in utero is an indication of their energy levels later.  If that is the case, then I am in for a seriously HIGH energy child.  I know that I am being preemptive as well as paranoid.  But, Elliott was and still is a chill kiddo, and we are grateful each and every day for it.  The hubby and I joked (we don't joke any longer--now we look grim with despair) that our second kid would be a ball of energy coupled with an irrational/emotional streak.  More on that later of course.

Other than that, all is well.  According to the scale I didn't gain any weight.  But again, it was a different scale. I was able to get a flu shot, and the H1N1 vaccine will be available in October (for which I will qualify because I am prego).  Elliott is doing fantastic.  He is a wonderful person to be around, and I am trying to savor each day we get to spend with one another before our second son is born.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

28 weeks and counting

To add to my current list of anxiety and worry, I can now add a breech baby to my list.  Thank you Anon commenter--I know I should relax and enjoy and stress less -- you advice is well received and much appreciated!  I am doing much better at taking things in stride the last couple of weeks.  


I went to my 28 week Midwife appointment yesterday. On my list of things to discuss with her were my 2nd trimester bout of the blues, constipation, and when babies get into the head down position (34 weeks or so).


You see, I had a strong feeling in my stomach (pun intended) that this little guy was facing the wrong way.  She checked him, and he indeed is head up.  Of course, there is PLENTY of time for him to turn and face down.  But, from my day to day experiences with him--he seems to like being head up.  


This is one active baby though, and most days he is alert and moving like crazy from 4-11pm.  The midwife thought that perhaps the placental positioning was causing me to feel more movement that usual.  But, alas--its anterior which typically allows you to feel less movement.  


I am grateful that the wee one allows me to sleep very well, most nights I only wake to pee once.  My overall comfort level lately is good.  I attribute the additional comfort to the wide variety of yoga pants that I have recently acquired and wear on a daily basis without shame.  And the ever growing pillow palace I sleep with.  My back is starting to feel the pressure of the added weight, but I am hoping to continue to do Yoga and Stroller Strides to help alleviate my aches and pains.


I passed both of my glucose tests, so I can rest easy that I won't have to struggle with gestational diabetes.  The only test left is the Beta-Strep.  And now we move onto appointments every 2 weeks with the midwife.  

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

summiting K2--Elliott's 2nd dental visit

Today we took Elliott to his second dental appointment of his young life.  His first appointment was when he was 14 months old.  He didn't have any area's we were concerned about, but we do want him to become familiar with the experience and stave off any potential cavities.


We also have dental insurance that covers some of his visits, and found an incredible pediatric dentist. The office is designed for kids and adults alike.  There is a coffee machine in the waiting area with latte's and all the fixins.  There is a video game room, a TV area, and a play area for the little ones.  Very comfortable and relaxing.  


They give new patients an "I'm Special" sticker when they arrive.  They are very friendly and allow the children to get comfortable with the tools and office equipment before the dentist comes in.  They were careful to close the door when they heard other children crying.  The dentist himself took some time to talk with Elliott directly before starting the exam.  


Now the exam was something else all together for our wee lad.  He was hysterical for the 5 minutes it may have taken for the dentist to look at his teeth.  He was sweaty and stressed when it over.  He didn't want to look at or talk with the dentist for a full 10 minutes while he counseled us on good dental health, positive eating habits, and strongly advised us to kick the pacifier habit.  But, by the end, he said 'thank you' to the dentist and gave him a high five.  


He didn't notice any problem area's except for the front 2 upper teeth, which we admittedly have trouble brushing.  And the hygienist informed us that his upper lip was tightly affixed to the gums on the top and that may contribute to the challenge.  They recommended we floss the upper 2 teeth, but that a traditional cleaning wasn't needed as there was no plaque.


The dentist informed us that he had all 20 of his baby teeth (which was news to me--I thought we were still waiting for his big molars to come in).  Yes, I win the bad Mom award for the week.  Hmm, perhaps that was why he was so sensitive when I was in charge of brushing his teeth...  Now, I have a knot in my tummy for being not only a bad Mom, but an insensitive one as well.  Well, on the bright side we are done with teething!  Hooray for that.  


Elliott had a less severe but still valiant meltdown when the hygienist brushed and flossed his teeth.  But was much happier there as he got to pick out his tooth brush and a toy.  


The dentist offered some good advice that I wanted to share with you, dear internet.  We have tried just about everything we could to get Elliott to warm up to the idea of tooth brushing.  He would throw K2 size tantrums when it came time to brush.  We tried different locations to brush, letting him brush first, letting him brush our teeth, singing a song, silence during brushing, changing the time we brushed, getting new toothbrushes and toothpaste, letting him pick them out, a musical tooth brush, forcing him to brush through restraint, sticker charts (for many, many months), prizes for a completed sticker chart, stickers as rewards for brushing, and shamefully last: fear tactics of eminent cavities and threats of black teeth.  Did I mention education in there also?  We have several books about teeth, dental heath and good brushing habits.


So, the advice he gave was to sing the ABC's while brushing.  He said the song is familiar, it lasts the correct amount of time, and there is a known end every time.  He also suggested brushing with your child post-bath when they are the most relaxed and with them wrapped in a towel, so you can restrain their hands and arms.  Lastly he said to get them in the habit of laying down to brush since this is how they will examine him at the dentist's office.


All and in, he scored a 94% on his dental report card which is far better than either of his parents scored on their latest visits with the dentist and hygienist.   Next visit--6 months.   

Saturday, September 5, 2009

3rd trimester jitters

I have just been hit by the wave.  The wave of realization that I am now, today, in my third trimester.  I am 28 weeks pregnant and in just a few weeks (I am counting on only 10 more weeks--not a day longer), I will be holding my wonderful new son in my arms.  I am relying on the fact that Elliott was 10 days early, and the rate this one is growing and moving should bring him sooner rather than later as well.

The parenting part, while daunting in its uncertainty, doesn't worry me.  I know that things will work out as they should.  The gear planning part is what I  was initially worried about. When should I put the car seat in? When should I start washing and organizing his clothes. Should I buy diapers now or later? What should I do to prepare Elliott for his arrival? What about the dog and cat?

I am also worried about who will take care of Elliott when I go into labor, or worse if I end up having to have another C-section.  We don't have any family in San Diego, and my family rarely, if ever, comes to visit.  The closest family we have is 3 hours away.  What if I go into labor at night while he is sleeping--who do we call?

What do most people do in this situation?  I struggle with the issue of asking for help.  I have a large network of friends, but most have small children of their own, as well as careers to think about. I also have 2 friends that are pregnant at the same time as I am -- one is due 5 weeks before me and the other is due 5 weeks after.  I cant ask them--they have enough to worry about. I also wouldn't want to leave Elliott with someone he barely knows, particularly during such a transitory time in his life.

I have mentioned in previous posts how very small our house is.  Being just 2 bedrooms/1 bathroom and 1000 sq feet--having people stay here is a logistical challenge.  And this applies spatially as well as personally for me.  When there are things in my life that I can not control (a new baby, sleeplessness, a stir crazy toddler, things our of place, etc.), I struggle to ensure order around me-and that usually starts with my home. Often times this is an endless hopeless battle, but I still will try to fight it.

So many of the little details are now upon me.  I need to start making decisions, rather than just pondering the what if's.  Any suggestions or advice is welcome.  De-lurk and add a comment!

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

I do my worst parenting when pregnant

I have heard from several Mom’s who have multiple children (that is more than one child, not twins) that they did their worst parenting while they were pregnant.  And then I heard that the Duggar’s are expecting their 19th child as well as their 1st grandchild. 

I wonder sometimes why I can’t do it all, why I feel so overwhelmed.  And then I feel guilty because I can’t seem to hold it together.  I lose my temper so easily.  And then that leads me into wondering if I am trying hard enough to be a good person (insert wife, mom, friend as needed).  Am I weak?  Am I a slacker, a cop-out?  I become riddled with guilt if I allow my son to watch a video because I am just to exhausted to explain to him (over and over until a meltdown ensues) about why we limit TV time.  I spend the entire day beating myself up for being short with my hubby.  I curse my lack of self control when I eat yet another cookie instead of an apple.  It reminds me why I don’t ask for help more often.  I suck at being vulnerable. 

And in the next breath, I am happy again with myself.  I am forgiven.  I feel like in any given day I do accomplish a lot.  I am a good parent.  I remind myself that my son is joyful, polite, clean, and kind.  I am a good wife and caring friend.  My house is clean and organized.  Our bills are paid.  Everyone’s doctor and dental visits are scheduled and attended.  Baby #2 is growing, kicking like a pro-soccer player and healthy.  I forgive myself for allowing my raging hormones to get the best the of me.  I visit my due date calculator as affirmation that this emotional struggle won't last forever, there is an end in sight.

And then something else happens to set the roller coaster in motion again.  Wee, off we go again.